Well, a quick update from the other day...

Kelly and I had a gig saturday, which started very "don't touch me" and ended with her relaxing enough to talk friendly-like, much more as things were only a few days before.  Her back and feet were hurting, so when we got back to her place I rubbed them both, enjoyed sweet, pleasant (tho guarded) conversation, then left.  We had many emails between friday and monday, all about how I"ve disappointed her, she doesn't trust that I can take care of myself and that tho she hasn't completely closed the door on me as a friend, if a guy she found appealing and had his act together approached her, she wouldn't say no.  Nice, huh?  Then no contact for seeral days thil she emailed me to see how the jobhunt was going on wednesday - since then, some brief emails back and forth, lighthearted and stress-free.

So, in a daze, I've been spending about 10-12 hours a day answering job ads.  May have found one or two interesting ones - don't wanna elaborate until they're done or dun.  I've been going to CODA meetings all but one night this week and looking at life post-failure.  I will not allow this to happen to me again.  One grant came through and I'm waiting for word from the other one now.

I MAY be scoring a movie that's being shot in South Dakota right now - won't know till the end of the month.  If it happens, I'll have to figure out how to do it while keeping the job (whichever one it is).  Even tho I've probably lost Kelly, I still want to get the thing that broke us apart - STABILITY.

Looks like I didn't get the McDonald's commercial where I played spoons for a new burger being perpetrated on the French and Germans - yah, my cartoon life still makes occasional appearances, however faded and rusty.

LATE BREAKING NEWS:  I AM EMPLOYED.   The place is a start-up.  It is, for lack of a better description, an agency for a group of Forensic Experts.  Lawyers hire them for whatever case.  I call the lawyers to let them know about the service.  It doesn't pay tons, but since it's the owner/psychotherapist and me, if we make it work, it can be very lucrative.  Lawyers need these people anyway and I'm calling them about specific cases.  The job is five blocks from my house, so,... I'm taking it.  Still hitting an interview on monday to make inkydinky sure, however it's probably a waste of time.

Now to make it work F-A-S-T and get my life/stuff/self-respect/girl back.